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It is currently Sat Jul 26, 2025 9:55 pm
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Mole
Minor Diety
Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2003 5:09 pm
Posts: 4004
Location: Walsall, West Mids, UK
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Hahahahaha.
Idiots.
And dude, that's Al from home improvement. That's what made that video worth watching.
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| Sat Feb 18, 2006 1:03 pm |
 
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Satis
Felix Rex
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2003 6:01 pm
Posts: 16703
Location: On a slope
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heh...I like the expression he gets.
Aynway...don't lump me in with stupid America. Not every American is ignorant.
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They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.
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| Sat Feb 18, 2006 4:16 pm |
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Myrddin L'argenton
King
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2003 6:17 am
Posts: 1717
Location: The Plateaus of Insanity
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Unfortunately I know that too well, just making a general comment. Sos if any offence, I would be 
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I think drugs have done some really good things. If you don't believe me, go home tonight, take all your cassettes, CDs, etc and burn them. Because those artists that have made that music were real fucking high- Bill Hicks
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| Sat Feb 18, 2006 4:49 pm |
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derf
Minor Diety
Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2003 2:17 pm
Posts: 7737
Location: Centre of the sun
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  Another Italian translated joke: 
In New York, a new shop has been opened whereby women can come to choose and buy a husband. At the entrance, there are instructions on how the shop works:
1) You can visit our shop ONLY ONCE.
2) There are only 6 floors and the characteristics of the men improve the higher up you go.
3) You can choose any man at any one floor, or you can choose to go up to the next floor.
4) You cannot return to the floor below.
Once day, a woman decides to go and visit the Shop Of Husbands to find a companion.
At the first floor, the sign sais "These men have a job."
The woman decides to go to the next floor up.
At the second floor, the sign sais "These men have a job, and love children."
The woman decides to go to the next floor up.
At the third floor, the sign sais "These men have a job, and love children, and are extremely beautiful."
The woman sais "wow", but feels she needs to go to the next level up.
At the fourth floor, the sign sais "These men have a job, and love children, and are very extremely beautiful, and always help out around the house."
"Incredible! I can hardly resist" Sais the woman, but she decides to go to the next floor.
At the fifth floor, the sign sais "These men have a job, and love children, and are very extremely beautiful, and always help out around the house, and are very romantic."
Now the woman is very tempted to choose a man, but she decides to go up to the last floor.
At the sixth floor, the sign sais "You are visitor No. 31,456,012 for this floor. Here there are no men, this floor exists soleley to demonstrate how impossible it is to satisfy a woman. Thanks for choosing our store!
Beside this shop, a Shop Of Wives has also been opened. It works exactly the same, but a man buys a wife. At the first floor, there are "Women who love to have sex". At the second floor, there are "Women who love to have sex and are rich."
The remaining 4 floors HAVE NEVER BEEN VISITED.
 | | | | Quote: Di fronte a questo negozio è stato aperto un Negozio di Mogli. Al primo
piano ci sono don ne che amano far sesso. Al secondo piano ci sono donne che
amano far sesso e sono ricche.
I piani dal terzo al sesto NON SONO MAI STATI VISITATI.
A New York è stato appena aperto un nuovo negozio dove le donne possono
scegliere e comprare un marito. All'entrata sono esposte le istruzioni su
come funziona il negozio:
1) Puoi visitare il negozio SOLO UNA VOLTA.
2) Ci sono 6 piani e le caratteristiche degli uomini migliorano salendo.
3) Puoi scegliere qualsiasi uomo ad un piano oppure salire al piano
superiore.
4) Non si può ritornare al piano inferiore.
Una donna decide di andare a visitare il Negozio di Mariti per trovare un
compagno.
Al primo piano l'insegna sulla porta dice: "Questi uomini hanno un lavoro."
La donna decide di salire al successivo.
Al secondo piano l'insegna sulla porta dice: "Questi uomini hanno un lavoro
e amano i bambini." La donna decide di salire al successivo.
Al terzo piano l'insegna sulla porta dice: "Questi uomi ni hanno un lavoro,
amano i bambini e sono estremamente belli.". "Wow" - pensa la donna, ma si
sente di salire ancora.
Al quarto piano l'insegna sulla porta dice: "Questi uomini hanno un lavoro,
amano i bambini, sono belli da morire e aiutano a fare le faccende di casa."
- Incredibile! - esclama la donna - Posso difficilmente resistere!
Ma, detto questo, sale ancora. Al quinto piano l'insegna sulla porta dice:
"Questi uomini hanno un lavoro, amano i bambini, sono belli da morire,
aiutano nelle faccende domestiche e sono estremamente romantici."
La donna è tentata di restare e sceglierne uno, invece decide di salire
all'ultimo piano.
Il cartello del sesto piano: "Sei la visitatrice No. 31.456.012 di questo
piano, qui non ci sono uomini, questo piano esiste solamente per dimostrare
come sia impossibile accontentare una donna. Grazie per aver scelto il
nostro negozio!"
Di fronte a questo negozio è stato aperto un Negozio di Mogli. Al primo
piano ci sono don ne che amano far sesso. Al secondo piano ci sono donne che
amano far sesso e sono ricche.
I piani dal terzo al sesto NON SONO MAI STATI VISITATI. | | | | |
_________________
"Well a very, very hevate, ah, heavy duh burtation tonight. We had a very derrist derrison, bite, let's go ahead and terrist teysond those fullabit who have the pit." - Serene Branson
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| Tue Feb 21, 2006 8:15 am |
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RB
Emperor
Joined: Wed Apr 16, 2003 1:25 am
Posts: 2560
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Yay! This thing is incredible. I don't wish to imagine what mess it would make on some forum with over 50% girls. I'll see it. ^^
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| Tue Feb 21, 2006 12:12 pm |
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Myrddin L'argenton
King
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2003 6:17 am
Posts: 1717
Location: The Plateaus of Insanity
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Who the hell is this person as I don't know what to call them (...)  Nice joke tho derf.
_________________
I think drugs have done some really good things. If you don't believe me, go home tonight, take all your cassettes, CDs, etc and burn them. Because those artists that have made that music were real fucking high- Bill Hicks
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| Tue Feb 21, 2006 2:08 pm |
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Rinox
Minor Diety
Joined: Mon Mar 31, 2003 7:23 am
Posts: 14892
Location: behind a good glass of Duvel
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It's our beloved Gfreeman...hehe. He had a makeover and cleaned up his English, so he's hard to spot. Still, his general weirdness should give it away. 
Your English is improving rapidly Gfree, thumbs up! Keep going. 
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"I find a Burger Tank in this place? I'm-a be a one-man cheeseburger apocalypse."
- Coach
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| Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:25 pm |
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derf
Minor Diety
Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2003 2:17 pm
Posts: 7737
Location: Centre of the sun
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Youre right Ox, his last two posts were strangely understandable.
_________________
"Well a very, very hevate, ah, heavy duh burtation tonight. We had a very derrist derrison, bite, let's go ahead and terrist teysond those fullabit who have the pit." - Serene Branson
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| Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:41 pm |
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Myrddin L'argenton
King
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2003 6:17 am
Posts: 1717
Location: The Plateaus of Insanity
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*dances*
Well least I know who it is, I wonder who when suddenly someone with Marquis status shows up who I thought I'd never seen before. Nevermind its the same old GF.
_________________
I think drugs have done some really good things. If you don't believe me, go home tonight, take all your cassettes, CDs, etc and burn them. Because those artists that have made that music were real fucking high- Bill Hicks
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| Wed Feb 22, 2006 3:19 am |
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Satis
Felix Rex
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2003 6:01 pm
Posts: 16703
Location: On a slope
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_________________
They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.
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| Thu Feb 23, 2006 12:44 pm |
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Myrddin L'argenton
King
Joined: Mon Apr 14, 2003 6:17 am
Posts: 1717
Location: The Plateaus of Insanity
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Lol
_________________
I think drugs have done some really good things. If you don't believe me, go home tonight, take all your cassettes, CDs, etc and burn them. Because those artists that have made that music were real fucking high- Bill Hicks
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| Thu Feb 23, 2006 1:29 pm |
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derf
Minor Diety
Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2003 2:17 pm
Posts: 7737
Location: Centre of the sun
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_________________
"Well a very, very hevate, ah, heavy duh burtation tonight. We had a very derrist derrison, bite, let's go ahead and terrist teysond those fullabit who have the pit." - Serene Branson
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| Thu Feb 23, 2006 3:57 pm |
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RB
Emperor
Joined: Wed Apr 16, 2003 1:25 am
Posts: 2560
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Who the fuck is that guy? I am just not getting the humor.
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| Thu Feb 23, 2006 4:03 pm |
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Satis
Felix Rex
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2003 6:01 pm
Posts: 16703
Location: On a slope
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he's a b-movie action star. Something like that. He's played everything from commandos to...ermm...police....to....military....to...special forces. Basically he just kills lots of people and does some karate on top of it.
_________________
They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.
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| Thu Feb 23, 2006 4:10 pm |
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derf
Minor Diety
Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2003 2:17 pm
Posts: 7737
Location: Centre of the sun
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He worked with Bruce Lee too!
_________________
"Well a very, very hevate, ah, heavy duh burtation tonight. We had a very derrist derrison, bite, let's go ahead and terrist teysond those fullabit who have the pit." - Serene Branson
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| Thu Feb 23, 2006 4:12 pm |
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